So I think most of the country is back at school by this point (apart from some of the Eastern States). And so... I have 30 weeks of school left. Ever. (29, now). And I have major exams. In 29 weeks. I know nothing.
Apart from all that freaky stuff, we also have the school ball. God. With all the drama it's causing, I totally understand why it's at the beginning, rather than the end of the year. Although, speaking of the end of the year, Leavers looks like it's going to cause some major arguments as well. Don't get me started (I'll do that myself, later.)
Anyway, about the Sea Sheperd? Seriously, guys. You aren't impressing anyone. In fact, you're coming across less as 'animal activists' and more 'pirates who should really be arrested'. Now, while you were probably in international waters when this latest clash with the whalers happened, you all still hold (or you should, legally) an Australian skippers ticket. And that means that you're expected to know, and obey, some simple rules. Like the one how the little ships (you) give way to the big ships (the whalers) because they can't turn as fast and also they're generally commercial and thus have schedules, cargo, etc. And the second (and third) thing you should know is that if you're headed towards another ship and it looks like you're going to collide, you both turn right. Also that you don't get too close to another ship. So, realistically, you shouldn't really be complaining that they tried to ram you. It's just as much your responsibility to stay out of their way. Your ship is probably faster anyway. The complaint about them throwing a bamboo spear at you, I'll admit, that's not ok and was their fault. However, it's also not ok (and verges on piracy) for you to board their ship without invitation, like you did several years ago, so I kind of have to ask what you did to provoke them to throw this at you. (I did hear something about you throwing glass bottles at them. Whether this happened before or after the spear doesn't really matter... everyone involved is an idiot.)
And don't try to tell me 'What about the whales?!". What about the cows? And didn't anyone ever tell you that two wrongs don't make a right? Besides, vigilante justice is never the way to go. There's a reason that most democracies seperate the judicial system from the legislative (ie, the people who make the laws). That's because it's a sure way to get corruption if the people who create the laws also enforce them.
So quit it.
And the English language is really not working for me today.
Saturday, February 5, 2011
Monday, December 20, 2010
Communication
Yesterday, my best friend and I had a conversation that we've needed to have for about a year now. Because both of us have gone through so much personal shit this year, we've both, at times, reacted badly about it to each other. To be honest, she hasn't been the easiest person to be around this year. She's had problems at home that've made her upset and angry, but instead of talking to me about them, she lashed out. And because I didn't want to make things harder for her, I didn't tell her what was happening in my life, I told other people, making her feel like I was replacing her. And then I felt the same way, when, because she felt guilty about the way she'd been treating me and didn't want to make it worse or for me to worry, started telling other people what her problems or feelings were- when she spoke to anyone at all, and didn't just cut herself.
So we had a talk. And... it went well. We both admitted that we'd been angry with each other for quite a while, and we, well, I don't think either of us fully told each other all the secrets we've been keeping this year, but we both told each other how we'd been feeling, and why we'd been reacting the way we were. And then we forgave each other. It was the quietest end to the quietest argument ever. For this whole year, we haven't shouted at each other- snapped a bit, silently fumed, etc- there's been practically no tears- at least not in front of each other- but both of us have been, at least occasionally, completely furious with each other.
And I'm glad it turned out this way. Because for a while there a few weeks ago, I was so tired and sick of it all and convinced that I couldn't make it better that I nearly just gave up trying. And if I hadn't decided that we were going to have that conversation, even if it hurt both of us or made it worse, then by next year, we might not have been friends at all anymore, because I would have still been feeling angry and resentful, and given up, and she would have been still feeling angry and upset and we would have drifted even more apart than we already were. Or maybe we would have had an actual fight, I don't know.
The thing is, even when I decided to talk to her, I half expected that just bringing it up would cause a fight. She's been very touchy this year, and when stuff at home has been especially bad she would just snap at me for anything I said. And given that the first thing I asked was if she was still cutting herself... I don't think that there's ever a good time to bring that up. But I had to ask, because I saw the cuts on her arms a few weeks ago, but it took me this long to ask, partly because we were never alone for long enough, and partly because I felt angry and guilty, because when she first did it, earlier in the year, I didn't find out because she told me, or because I noticed. A mutual friend told me, by accident. And it hurt that my best friend didn't think she could tell me about something like that, or that I didn't notice.
So, even though I thought it might make her angry, it didn't. I think it hurt her, a bit, that I'd brought it up, but she was willing to talk to me, so I could tell her, calmly, that I was angry. I tried, and I think I managed it, not to sound like I was accusing her of anything, that I blamed her for anything. I told her the truth, and I'm pretty sure she told me the truth back. To be honest, this is the first real argument that we've ever had. And we've settled it a lot better than she's settled arguments with other people at school over the years, some of whom she now no longer speaks to. (It sounds, I don't know, conceited to say it, but it's true. This is quite literally the first fight I've had with anyone at school)
On the sidebar of this blog, it says that I'm a student trying to survive high school. But when I say that, most of the time, I don't mean the lessons and homework and assignments and exams and things like that, because I can choose whether or not I do them or care about them. Failing high school isn't the end of the world. Instead, I'm mostly talking about things like this, the personal stuff that can happen to anyone at any time at any stage in there life, that will always matter and you can't make them not matter. I'm talking about things like your best friend cutting herself, divorces, running away, abuse, fights, arrests, drugs, sex, alcohol, break ups- everything that goes wrong, that can go wrong. All those things are things that I've dealt with this year- some of them not personally, but because people I'm close to have been, and I can't not help them to deal with it. And they're the things that have worried me the most this year, because they matter the most. School? I suppose I'm lucky, in that I can be reasonably guaranteed of good results with a minimum or effort, but beyond that... school, and results, in the general scheme of things, don't matter. Life will still go on without them. You can still get into universities. You can still have a job. You can still succeed. You can still have family, friends, a life, all without perfect grades or even a high school certificate. Yes, it makes things a little easier to start off some careers, but it's not the most important thing. And a lot of the time, I forget that, and stress about whether or not I'm getting the marks I think I ought to be getting. But I'm trying not to.
I originally decided to keep things like this off the blog, even though they were most of the reason I started it in the first place. But I've realised that's kind of stupid. I'm not any more qualified to give advice about how to deal with things like this than I am to give advice about high school, but the main way I've got through this year is talking about it, and listening to other people talk about it, because it helped to know that I wasn't the only one, and that my problems weren't as bad as they sometimes seemed. Even though it sometimes overwhelms me, I love helping other people. So go ahead. Talk to me. Tell me your problems. Or else just read about mine. But more than that, talk to the people you need to talk to. Even if it might make things worse, if it's worth it, do it. I've been there, too, this year, and I still feel guilty for what happened because of what I did, even though, in the end, it turned out for the better- I think.
And now I'm just going to go ahead and post this, before I chicken out and delete it.
So we had a talk. And... it went well. We both admitted that we'd been angry with each other for quite a while, and we, well, I don't think either of us fully told each other all the secrets we've been keeping this year, but we both told each other how we'd been feeling, and why we'd been reacting the way we were. And then we forgave each other. It was the quietest end to the quietest argument ever. For this whole year, we haven't shouted at each other- snapped a bit, silently fumed, etc- there's been practically no tears- at least not in front of each other- but both of us have been, at least occasionally, completely furious with each other.
And I'm glad it turned out this way. Because for a while there a few weeks ago, I was so tired and sick of it all and convinced that I couldn't make it better that I nearly just gave up trying. And if I hadn't decided that we were going to have that conversation, even if it hurt both of us or made it worse, then by next year, we might not have been friends at all anymore, because I would have still been feeling angry and resentful, and given up, and she would have been still feeling angry and upset and we would have drifted even more apart than we already were. Or maybe we would have had an actual fight, I don't know.
The thing is, even when I decided to talk to her, I half expected that just bringing it up would cause a fight. She's been very touchy this year, and when stuff at home has been especially bad she would just snap at me for anything I said. And given that the first thing I asked was if she was still cutting herself... I don't think that there's ever a good time to bring that up. But I had to ask, because I saw the cuts on her arms a few weeks ago, but it took me this long to ask, partly because we were never alone for long enough, and partly because I felt angry and guilty, because when she first did it, earlier in the year, I didn't find out because she told me, or because I noticed. A mutual friend told me, by accident. And it hurt that my best friend didn't think she could tell me about something like that, or that I didn't notice.
So, even though I thought it might make her angry, it didn't. I think it hurt her, a bit, that I'd brought it up, but she was willing to talk to me, so I could tell her, calmly, that I was angry. I tried, and I think I managed it, not to sound like I was accusing her of anything, that I blamed her for anything. I told her the truth, and I'm pretty sure she told me the truth back. To be honest, this is the first real argument that we've ever had. And we've settled it a lot better than she's settled arguments with other people at school over the years, some of whom she now no longer speaks to. (It sounds, I don't know, conceited to say it, but it's true. This is quite literally the first fight I've had with anyone at school)
On the sidebar of this blog, it says that I'm a student trying to survive high school. But when I say that, most of the time, I don't mean the lessons and homework and assignments and exams and things like that, because I can choose whether or not I do them or care about them. Failing high school isn't the end of the world. Instead, I'm mostly talking about things like this, the personal stuff that can happen to anyone at any time at any stage in there life, that will always matter and you can't make them not matter. I'm talking about things like your best friend cutting herself, divorces, running away, abuse, fights, arrests, drugs, sex, alcohol, break ups- everything that goes wrong, that can go wrong. All those things are things that I've dealt with this year- some of them not personally, but because people I'm close to have been, and I can't not help them to deal with it. And they're the things that have worried me the most this year, because they matter the most. School? I suppose I'm lucky, in that I can be reasonably guaranteed of good results with a minimum or effort, but beyond that... school, and results, in the general scheme of things, don't matter. Life will still go on without them. You can still get into universities. You can still have a job. You can still succeed. You can still have family, friends, a life, all without perfect grades or even a high school certificate. Yes, it makes things a little easier to start off some careers, but it's not the most important thing. And a lot of the time, I forget that, and stress about whether or not I'm getting the marks I think I ought to be getting. But I'm trying not to.
I originally decided to keep things like this off the blog, even though they were most of the reason I started it in the first place. But I've realised that's kind of stupid. I'm not any more qualified to give advice about how to deal with things like this than I am to give advice about high school, but the main way I've got through this year is talking about it, and listening to other people talk about it, because it helped to know that I wasn't the only one, and that my problems weren't as bad as they sometimes seemed. Even though it sometimes overwhelms me, I love helping other people. So go ahead. Talk to me. Tell me your problems. Or else just read about mine. But more than that, talk to the people you need to talk to. Even if it might make things worse, if it's worth it, do it. I've been there, too, this year, and I still feel guilty for what happened because of what I did, even though, in the end, it turned out for the better- I think.
And now I'm just going to go ahead and post this, before I chicken out and delete it.
Saturday, December 4, 2010
What kind of study do you need the night before your exam?
So my exams are over now ('bout frickin' time already), I'm, well, as confident as can be expected, really, given that I tend to underestimate myself more than anything else. I'm pretty sure I passed physics, though, which is the only one I really had to worry about. And italian speaking, but I already know I passed that. Which was TERRIFYING, by the way. But anyway. I know that most people in Australia, anyway, have already done their exams (I know TEE is all over, yay for all my twelvie friends). But one thing that we've all been talking about for, like, two months now: How the hell DO you actually study for exams?
Obviously, there's about as many methods as there are people doing exams; so I'm going to narrow it down a bit more, to what you should do the night before the exam. Or my advice, anyway, because I'm completely willing to give my opinion even on subjects where I have little to no authority.
First, though: What kind of study do you actually need?
a) You're sitting at your desk the night (or morning!) before your exam, and you haven't actually started studying yet. You have a social life to maintain, dammit!
i) You have studied a bit, but it's a subject that you kinda suck at
and you were mostly on facebook when you were studying anyway.
b) You've revised the year, but not in any real depth, and you're ok at the subject, but have no real interest in it. You just need to do well/ pass/ convince your parents that you tried.
c) You, you dedicated person, have not only studied, you're good at the subject but you're freaking out anyway because, hey, exams are stressful.
Method A: You're completely screwed.
The sooner you accept that fact, the easier this will be. Unless you're a genius (in which case, see below) there's just no way you're going to be able to revise and memorise an entire year's worth of material in the, what, eight, twelve hours before your exam? And yeah, you are going to need to sleep tonight. Pulling an all nighter just isn't worth it. However, a pass is not out of the question.
So instead, you need to be clever. Guaranteed, your exam will not actually test everything you're meant to know. You need to prioritise. Chances are, your teacher has been dropping hints like mad for the past, y'know, week... month... year... but there's also a strong chance you weren't listening, or that you missed it. Embrace that fact. If you're going to go on facebook or msn or whatever, and you just might- unless you've taken the precaution of unplugging your computer (you are a stronger person than I am) - ask if anyone else knows what'll be in it. Someone will probably have a fairly good idea.
If not, though, you're going to need to focus on broad concepts. Don't try to read a whole lit book overnight, because it's not going to happen and won't help you (and you don't really need to), and don't try to teach yourself the intricacies of Newtonian physics when applied to the moon (although I really don't know what that's doing in your syllabus.) Instead, focus on the general stuff. For example, the physics exam I just did. I didn't really know, exactly, the answers to a fair few of the questions, but I knew the theories that they were referring to, and I knew, generally, what the four topics - heat, electricity, motion and nuclear- were about, and I kinda chucked an answer together based on that. Likewise, with lit, if you haven't read the book, try googling it. There's quite a few sites out there that provide everything you might need to an exam, although only with certain books. You'll need quotes- try to get some that are multi-purpose. Write stuff down. Preferably in a semi-organised fashion.
Method B: You should be fine
Ok, we'll just assume that you've got the broad outlines down, probably some depth in at least a few areas. You just need a bit more certainty, and you need that little bit of extra knowledge in order to guarantee a nice score.Focus in particular on the areas you aren't that great at. If you're worried that you might forget how to do a certain type of problem, a certain order of events, whatever, try writing it down. With the problems, you'll need to actually do them- there should be some in your book. With the other stuff, do a mind map, or a timeline, or whatever floats your boat. I recommend coloured pens, but then, I always recommend coloured pens, so, y'know.
Method C: You'll be fine, seriously.
There's no real reason for you to be worrying, at this point, but you will anyway and we all know it. Revise the areas you have problems with, you know what those are. And then, if you have time, and you will, because you've been doing this for like weeks now, revise those small, extra things that are the ones that will make sure you get the top marks. You know. That quote from, like, Wordsworth that you can drop into the conclusion of your english essay. That small, quiet political shenanigan that just may have influenced the course of World War Two. Etcetera. You're going to pass, and you're going to pass well- at this point it's just a question of how well.
Method D: Eternal hatred from all.
Screw you. You haven't studied, you haven't done any work all year, but you're going to get the top mark anyway, and you know it. It's the night before your exam and you're playing video games or something. The rest of us hate you. (not really.)
Obviously, there's about as many methods as there are people doing exams; so I'm going to narrow it down a bit more, to what you should do the night before the exam. Or my advice, anyway, because I'm completely willing to give my opinion even on subjects where I have little to no authority.
First, though: What kind of study do you actually need?
a) You're sitting at your desk the night (or morning!) before your exam, and you haven't actually started studying yet. You have a social life to maintain, dammit!
i) You have studied a bit, but it's a subject that you kinda suck at
and you were mostly on facebook when you were studying anyway.
b) You've revised the year, but not in any real depth, and you're ok at the subject, but have no real interest in it. You just need to do well/ pass/ convince your parents that you tried.
c) You, you dedicated person, have not only studied, you're good at the subject but you're freaking out anyway because, hey, exams are stressful.
Method A: You're completely screwed.
The sooner you accept that fact, the easier this will be. Unless you're a genius (in which case, see below) there's just no way you're going to be able to revise and memorise an entire year's worth of material in the, what, eight, twelve hours before your exam? And yeah, you are going to need to sleep tonight. Pulling an all nighter just isn't worth it. However, a pass is not out of the question.
So instead, you need to be clever. Guaranteed, your exam will not actually test everything you're meant to know. You need to prioritise. Chances are, your teacher has been dropping hints like mad for the past, y'know, week... month... year... but there's also a strong chance you weren't listening, or that you missed it. Embrace that fact. If you're going to go on facebook or msn or whatever, and you just might- unless you've taken the precaution of unplugging your computer (you are a stronger person than I am) - ask if anyone else knows what'll be in it. Someone will probably have a fairly good idea.
If not, though, you're going to need to focus on broad concepts. Don't try to read a whole lit book overnight, because it's not going to happen and won't help you (and you don't really need to), and don't try to teach yourself the intricacies of Newtonian physics when applied to the moon (although I really don't know what that's doing in your syllabus.) Instead, focus on the general stuff. For example, the physics exam I just did. I didn't really know, exactly, the answers to a fair few of the questions, but I knew the theories that they were referring to, and I knew, generally, what the four topics - heat, electricity, motion and nuclear- were about, and I kinda chucked an answer together based on that. Likewise, with lit, if you haven't read the book, try googling it. There's quite a few sites out there that provide everything you might need to an exam, although only with certain books. You'll need quotes- try to get some that are multi-purpose. Write stuff down. Preferably in a semi-organised fashion.
Method B: You should be fine
Ok, we'll just assume that you've got the broad outlines down, probably some depth in at least a few areas. You just need a bit more certainty, and you need that little bit of extra knowledge in order to guarantee a nice score.Focus in particular on the areas you aren't that great at. If you're worried that you might forget how to do a certain type of problem, a certain order of events, whatever, try writing it down. With the problems, you'll need to actually do them- there should be some in your book. With the other stuff, do a mind map, or a timeline, or whatever floats your boat. I recommend coloured pens, but then, I always recommend coloured pens, so, y'know.
Method C: You'll be fine, seriously.
There's no real reason for you to be worrying, at this point, but you will anyway and we all know it. Revise the areas you have problems with, you know what those are. And then, if you have time, and you will, because you've been doing this for like weeks now, revise those small, extra things that are the ones that will make sure you get the top marks. You know. That quote from, like, Wordsworth that you can drop into the conclusion of your english essay. That small, quiet political shenanigan that just may have influenced the course of World War Two. Etcetera. You're going to pass, and you're going to pass well- at this point it's just a question of how well.
Method D: Eternal hatred from all.
Screw you. You haven't studied, you haven't done any work all year, but you're going to get the top mark anyway, and you know it. It's the night before your exam and you're playing video games or something. The rest of us hate you. (not really.)
Monday, November 15, 2010
Don't ever do that again. Please.
Let's get this straight right now. I get that the school, and teachers, have a duty of care over all us students, and they're obliged to report things and take other necessary actions. I get that they're trying to help. (in most cases anyway). But, see, here's the thing: it's completely not ok to drag me out of class (in the week before my exams) and corner me in an office with the year co-ordinater and services co-ordinater and guilt trip/threaten me into telling them about who may or may not be taking drugs. No, really. It's just not.
And it becomes even less ok when the schools focus is simply on 'drugs bad' instead of 'help people who're vulnerable to this kind of thing right now'. There's always gonna be stoners, there's not a lot you can do about that. But in the particular case I got interrogated about, it was the pressure of other stuff that led the person in question to wanting to escape from it all. They didn't exactly choose the best way. And, frankly, I'd have been a lot more comfortable with telling them (the school) what they wanted to know if I'd been more confident that the school was going to focus on helping my friend, rather than punishing them.
And, while we're on the subject, it wasn't like the situation wasn't being handled. Several people, including me, had already spoken to her about the whole, 'drugs bad' thing. She wasn't going to go it again, she was seeing a psych, she had another place to stay if she needed it. Believe it or not, adminstratory people, students can, actually, be trusted to look after themselves and each other just fine. And its not like I haven't been handling people in crisis ALL YEAR.
So, overall, things didn't turn out as bad as they could have. The school actually got their act together and did some useful things, as well as a whole lot of not so helpful things. But, at the same time, most of what they're doing isn't actually helping what was the original problem in the FIRST place. No, that particular mess is the problem of the same people it would have been if the school hadn't decided they were going to bully their way into it: my friend, me, and the few other people that know what's going on.
So, to the school: Yes, you have a duty of care. But if you can't actually solve the problem, it's really kind of stupid wading in and potentially making it worse, as well as really, really putting me off talking to you about anything, ever. Like, really. That was intimidating. Don't do it again.
And it becomes even less ok when the schools focus is simply on 'drugs bad' instead of 'help people who're vulnerable to this kind of thing right now'. There's always gonna be stoners, there's not a lot you can do about that. But in the particular case I got interrogated about, it was the pressure of other stuff that led the person in question to wanting to escape from it all. They didn't exactly choose the best way. And, frankly, I'd have been a lot more comfortable with telling them (the school) what they wanted to know if I'd been more confident that the school was going to focus on helping my friend, rather than punishing them.
And, while we're on the subject, it wasn't like the situation wasn't being handled. Several people, including me, had already spoken to her about the whole, 'drugs bad' thing. She wasn't going to go it again, she was seeing a psych, she had another place to stay if she needed it. Believe it or not, adminstratory people, students can, actually, be trusted to look after themselves and each other just fine. And its not like I haven't been handling people in crisis ALL YEAR.
So, overall, things didn't turn out as bad as they could have. The school actually got their act together and did some useful things, as well as a whole lot of not so helpful things. But, at the same time, most of what they're doing isn't actually helping what was the original problem in the FIRST place. No, that particular mess is the problem of the same people it would have been if the school hadn't decided they were going to bully their way into it: my friend, me, and the few other people that know what's going on.
So, to the school: Yes, you have a duty of care. But if you can't actually solve the problem, it's really kind of stupid wading in and potentially making it worse, as well as really, really putting me off talking to you about anything, ever. Like, really. That was intimidating. Don't do it again.
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Who needs a partner anyway?
Ok, so our school ball isn't until next year, but a while ago one of the guys worked up the courage to actually ask a girl to go with him, sending off this massive chain reaction that hit half the guys in our year, thus sparking this long list of "Will you go to the ball with me?"
It's sort of slowed down a bit now, but that means everyone can look around and take in the damage. No massive fights (that I know of, and I normally know) over anyone, or anything dramatic like that, but for some reason there's now a whole lot of ball-date-less girls wandering around discussing all the guys left in our year who are similarly date-less and deciding which one they'd like to ask them, and then panicking about "What happens if I don't have a partner?"
The thing is, though, there are more girls than guys in our year, and there's a limit to how many people from out of school can be invited, since there's a person capacity for the place we're going. So, yes, even if every guy in our year did pair of with someone, there'd probably still be date-less girls on the night. And almost every girl is determined to make sure that's not them.
I just don't get why it's such a big issue not to have a date. (Disclosure: I'm currently not going with anyone, but this isn't going to be an angry bitter rant about "why won't anyone ask me".) See, even if every single one of my friends paired off, most of them are only going with their dates as friends, because they want to take someone. So it's not like I'd be all alone- no matter how it goes, it's still going to be a case of partying with my friends. There's only about two couples I'm friends with that it would be awkward and potentially sickening to be around.
And the second reason is that- I don't want to go with someone just because I don't want to be dateless. I'd rather go 'alone' (even though I'd be with all my friends) than go with someone I hardly talk to, like some of the more desperate girls I know are planning. Some of my friends have suggested that I go with one of the two unpaired guys in our group (he was sick for the two weeks all this happened in, and the other one's just shy). But the thing is, even though he's "in the group" I hardly talk to him. Going with him really would be awkward. If I go with anyone, I want to go with someone I'm actually really good friends with.
(You'll note that I haven't even brought up the whole "I've got a crush on this guy but he doesn't like me/has a girlfriend/whatever" thing. That's because I'm not here to give relationship advice, and I'd probably suck at it. None of my friend listen to me, anyway)
But the overall message here is:
Girls, guys- don't feel bad if you're 'dateless' to your ball/prom/party/other. Remember: You have friends, and it's a little bit sad if you would have ditched them for the night if you were with someone. Party with them. And if you are going with someone, don't forget your other friends. (you know who you are, people likely to do this.)
(And in a continued full disclosure, I should probably add that:
1: I generally have a low opinion of most of the guys at school.
2: I do have 'backups' if I do decide later that I'll die without a date.
3: I have at least one girl friend who feels more or less the same way, so even if every other person in our year magically paired off, I still wouldn't be 'alone', unless one of us finds someone we really like in the next several months. In which case, we've both promised not to ditch each other.)
It's sort of slowed down a bit now, but that means everyone can look around and take in the damage. No massive fights (that I know of, and I normally know) over anyone, or anything dramatic like that, but for some reason there's now a whole lot of ball-date-less girls wandering around discussing all the guys left in our year who are similarly date-less and deciding which one they'd like to ask them, and then panicking about "What happens if I don't have a partner?"
The thing is, though, there are more girls than guys in our year, and there's a limit to how many people from out of school can be invited, since there's a person capacity for the place we're going. So, yes, even if every guy in our year did pair of with someone, there'd probably still be date-less girls on the night. And almost every girl is determined to make sure that's not them.
I just don't get why it's such a big issue not to have a date. (Disclosure: I'm currently not going with anyone, but this isn't going to be an angry bitter rant about "why won't anyone ask me".) See, even if every single one of my friends paired off, most of them are only going with their dates as friends, because they want to take someone. So it's not like I'd be all alone- no matter how it goes, it's still going to be a case of partying with my friends. There's only about two couples I'm friends with that it would be awkward and potentially sickening to be around.
And the second reason is that- I don't want to go with someone just because I don't want to be dateless. I'd rather go 'alone' (even though I'd be with all my friends) than go with someone I hardly talk to, like some of the more desperate girls I know are planning. Some of my friends have suggested that I go with one of the two unpaired guys in our group (he was sick for the two weeks all this happened in, and the other one's just shy). But the thing is, even though he's "in the group" I hardly talk to him. Going with him really would be awkward. If I go with anyone, I want to go with someone I'm actually really good friends with.
(You'll note that I haven't even brought up the whole "I've got a crush on this guy but he doesn't like me/has a girlfriend/whatever" thing. That's because I'm not here to give relationship advice, and I'd probably suck at it. None of my friend listen to me, anyway)
But the overall message here is:
Girls, guys- don't feel bad if you're 'dateless' to your ball/prom/party/other. Remember: You have friends, and it's a little bit sad if you would have ditched them for the night if you were with someone. Party with them. And if you are going with someone, don't forget your other friends. (you know who you are, people likely to do this.)
(And in a continued full disclosure, I should probably add that:
1: I generally have a low opinion of most of the guys at school.
2: I do have 'backups' if I do decide later that I'll die without a date.
3: I have at least one girl friend who feels more or less the same way, so even if every other person in our year magically paired off, I still wouldn't be 'alone', unless one of us finds someone we really like in the next several months. In which case, we've both promised not to ditch each other.)
Saturday, October 30, 2010
Don't be a douche.
I work part time at a local grocery store. Because of the time I work, I mostly deal with lovely old people and families and they're generally really nice. But every so often, we get complete assholes come in, which is completely unsurprising, given the suburb I work in. Yes, I'm paid to help out customers and do all this other stuff. But there are some things that, nonetheless, I shouldn't have to deal with. So, to all those people who come into shops and do the things listed below, to you I say: Don't be a douche. You know who you are.
1) Don't try to tell me you don't have enough money, and look at me like it's my fault and you want ME to solve it, when I can CLEARLY SEE that you do have the money in your wallet. Also, don't look at me like it's my fault and you want me to solve it even if you DON'T have the money. I'm just a checkout chick. There's nothing I can do for you. Go talk to my boss. (yes, there are some people I feel really sorry for, because what they're buying is food that they actually need, but you know, they're generally the ones that go ok, I'm sorry, I don't have enough money, I'll do figure something out, bye)
2) Don't leave your crap lying on my till. Particularly not when it consists of used tissues or your baby's dirty nappy. It's not ok. People's FOOD goes on that. Also, don't bleed on it. I repeat: people's food goes on that! Would you like me to bleed all over your food? No? Don't do it then. I'm a LITTLE more lenient if you actually ask me for a bin, even though there is one like three meters away from where we're standing, but nonetheless, please don't ask me to handle your tissue/diaper/blood. Just... don't.
3) Don't leave your trolleys/baskets lying anywhere you damn please. If you put them on the groun in front of the till, yes, people ARE going to trip over them. And no, looking around like you're all lost and don't know where to put them isn't going to help your case. Just put them back where you damn got them already, which is what, about three metres away? Maybe five steps if you have short legs? Or if you're really in THAT much of a hurry, just leave the damn thing on the till and I'll take care of it. Just don't dump it on the floor where people will trip over it, or else my boss will probably get sued. Have to say though, the Queen of this is that fricking woman who walked her empty trolley about two steps towards where she'd gotten it from (about, say, eight metres away) then gave it this tiny little push, JUST enough to get it RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DAMN AISLE, then walked off and just left it there. According to the girl I work with, my face was priceless. I was thisclose to slapping that woman simply for being a lazy cow. Like, REALLY? She could have even just left it at the end of the till.
4) Don't come in right on our closing time and say "I just need some milk" then try to do your weekly shopping. We're not getting paid for overtime, and we don't have to deal with your crap. Yes, we can and will kick you out. (Well, more accurately, the manager will.)
5) This is not a free food place. Seriously. It does still count as stealing if you eat grapes or give your kid an apple while you walk around the shop. Even if you buy some of them. You can't do it. You know you can't. Otherwise you wouldn't try to hide it when I walk past. Just don't.
6) Please don't talk on your mobile phone while I'm serving you. It's quite rude.
7) Don't give me crap for stuff that actually has nothing to do with me. Especially if I'm trying to help you regardless. And, yes, actually, we all do make mistakes, so if I have made a mistake, please just tell me about it, calmly, and I'll fix it. Calmly. And in far, far less time than if you try to yell at me first, which, by the way, makes me much less inclined to do everything I can to help you, and more inclined to ask my boss to throw you out. Which, yeah, he'd probably do.
8) Please don't be creepy. That includes creepily ask my name or say other creepy things to me, because it's freaky and kind of scary. Also, if you must be creepy, please... try and make sense too? Because there are times when I really don't know if I should be scared and calling my boss, or if you're actually just an idiot and don't know what you're doing. (BTW, man - you know who you are- you're not a milkshake, and even if I could/would shake you, I don't think that would make you thicker, so whatever you were on about... you should work on your metaphor.)
So, that's my rant, and a list of behavior that you should never, ever exhibit to a checkout chick. (or dude). Please. For the sake of us all. Even if you aren't now, you probably were once, or you might be soon. Just... yeah. Don't be a douche.
(Also, to all you people who are lovely and make me smile every time I see you... you're awesome.)
1) Don't try to tell me you don't have enough money, and look at me like it's my fault and you want ME to solve it, when I can CLEARLY SEE that you do have the money in your wallet. Also, don't look at me like it's my fault and you want me to solve it even if you DON'T have the money. I'm just a checkout chick. There's nothing I can do for you. Go talk to my boss. (yes, there are some people I feel really sorry for, because what they're buying is food that they actually need, but you know, they're generally the ones that go ok, I'm sorry, I don't have enough money, I'll do figure something out, bye)
2) Don't leave your crap lying on my till. Particularly not when it consists of used tissues or your baby's dirty nappy. It's not ok. People's FOOD goes on that. Also, don't bleed on it. I repeat: people's food goes on that! Would you like me to bleed all over your food? No? Don't do it then. I'm a LITTLE more lenient if you actually ask me for a bin, even though there is one like three meters away from where we're standing, but nonetheless, please don't ask me to handle your tissue/diaper/blood. Just... don't.
3) Don't leave your trolleys/baskets lying anywhere you damn please. If you put them on the groun in front of the till, yes, people ARE going to trip over them. And no, looking around like you're all lost and don't know where to put them isn't going to help your case. Just put them back where you damn got them already, which is what, about three metres away? Maybe five steps if you have short legs? Or if you're really in THAT much of a hurry, just leave the damn thing on the till and I'll take care of it. Just don't dump it on the floor where people will trip over it, or else my boss will probably get sued. Have to say though, the Queen of this is that fricking woman who walked her empty trolley about two steps towards where she'd gotten it from (about, say, eight metres away) then gave it this tiny little push, JUST enough to get it RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DAMN AISLE, then walked off and just left it there. According to the girl I work with, my face was priceless. I was thisclose to slapping that woman simply for being a lazy cow. Like, REALLY? She could have even just left it at the end of the till.
4) Don't come in right on our closing time and say "I just need some milk" then try to do your weekly shopping. We're not getting paid for overtime, and we don't have to deal with your crap. Yes, we can and will kick you out. (Well, more accurately, the manager will.)
5) This is not a free food place. Seriously. It does still count as stealing if you eat grapes or give your kid an apple while you walk around the shop. Even if you buy some of them. You can't do it. You know you can't. Otherwise you wouldn't try to hide it when I walk past. Just don't.
6) Please don't talk on your mobile phone while I'm serving you. It's quite rude.
7) Don't give me crap for stuff that actually has nothing to do with me. Especially if I'm trying to help you regardless. And, yes, actually, we all do make mistakes, so if I have made a mistake, please just tell me about it, calmly, and I'll fix it. Calmly. And in far, far less time than if you try to yell at me first, which, by the way, makes me much less inclined to do everything I can to help you, and more inclined to ask my boss to throw you out. Which, yeah, he'd probably do.
8) Please don't be creepy. That includes creepily ask my name or say other creepy things to me, because it's freaky and kind of scary. Also, if you must be creepy, please... try and make sense too? Because there are times when I really don't know if I should be scared and calling my boss, or if you're actually just an idiot and don't know what you're doing. (BTW, man - you know who you are- you're not a milkshake, and even if I could/would shake you, I don't think that would make you thicker, so whatever you were on about... you should work on your metaphor.)
So, that's my rant, and a list of behavior that you should never, ever exhibit to a checkout chick. (or dude). Please. For the sake of us all. Even if you aren't now, you probably were once, or you might be soon. Just... yeah. Don't be a douche.
(Also, to all you people who are lovely and make me smile every time I see you... you're awesome.)
Well, that's one way to get an extension...
It's like having this internal, kinda vague calender. As soon as it starts getting towards a) the end of term, b) exams or c) both, my behavior/emotions go completely crazy and I bounce back and forwards between "eh, it'll be fine" and "oh my god oh my god oh my god I'm going to fail at life and it's going to be incredibly, INSANELY awful and oh my god...". Yeah, right now, I'm heading towards c) and most of this past week has been in the "oh my god" stage, meaning... I've been just a bit erratic at school.
However, I did get an extension for one of my essays (worth, like, 25% of my mark for that subject) the other day, not because I asked for it, but because the teacher was like "whoa, ok, she REALLY needs to chill out" and also I think he just wanted me to go away. Basically, he was going around the class, checking up on how everyone was going, because he's nice like that, and.... I started crying. Every. Single. Time. he spoke to me.
That went down well.
Poor guy, he's clearly clueless when it comes to teenage girls crying, and I suppose I can't really blame him, since he probably didn't want to y'know, hug me, since that could end up with him getting fired, because my school's a little crazy like that (although, oddly, they did keep on the teacher who assaulted a student*...) Anyway, his response the first time was "ok, deep breaths, calm down... I'll talk to you later."
Second time? "Ok, ok, don't panic... tell you what, have an extension, you've been awesome this year, just... have an extension. Please stop crying."
And so I kind of mumbled something about not wanting an extension and then wandered off. That class was, um, embarrassing, but thankfully most of my year is a bit on the crazy side right now, and I'm not the only person going into hysterics in class, so that's all cool.
Anyway, the reason that I didn't just come straight out and ask him for an extension, or just say yes thankyou when he offered it, is pretty simple and really dumb. I don't like taking extensions. I've had one other one this year, and that was because of a whole lot of stuff going on outside of school that was stressing me out more than enough, and I so didn't need that assignment freaking me out as well. Thankfully, I had an understanding teacher.
The main reason i don't like taking extensions is I feel really, really guilt about it. Like, oh, I could have worked harder if I'd tried, I could have done it on time, or else everyone else has problems too, they still managed it... etcetera. However, every so often, my common sense does kick in, and I just take the damn extension already. This week was one of those times.
*ok, so I don't know the EXACT story, since she's a few years below me and I heard it from someone who heard it from someone and so on, but basically she was wearing like some weird thing in her hair, and for some reason decided that it would be a really, really awesome idea to superglue it on. When she told the teacher she couldn't take it off, he pulled it, and she like lost hair and skin and whatnot. And, to be honest, all I have to say is... "SUPERGLUE? You REALLY thought that that would be a good idea? Come on..."
However, I did get an extension for one of my essays (worth, like, 25% of my mark for that subject) the other day, not because I asked for it, but because the teacher was like "whoa, ok, she REALLY needs to chill out" and also I think he just wanted me to go away. Basically, he was going around the class, checking up on how everyone was going, because he's nice like that, and.... I started crying. Every. Single. Time. he spoke to me.
That went down well.
Poor guy, he's clearly clueless when it comes to teenage girls crying, and I suppose I can't really blame him, since he probably didn't want to y'know, hug me, since that could end up with him getting fired, because my school's a little crazy like that (although, oddly, they did keep on the teacher who assaulted a student*...) Anyway, his response the first time was "ok, deep breaths, calm down... I'll talk to you later."
Second time? "Ok, ok, don't panic... tell you what, have an extension, you've been awesome this year, just... have an extension. Please stop crying."
And so I kind of mumbled something about not wanting an extension and then wandered off. That class was, um, embarrassing, but thankfully most of my year is a bit on the crazy side right now, and I'm not the only person going into hysterics in class, so that's all cool.
Anyway, the reason that I didn't just come straight out and ask him for an extension, or just say yes thankyou when he offered it, is pretty simple and really dumb. I don't like taking extensions. I've had one other one this year, and that was because of a whole lot of stuff going on outside of school that was stressing me out more than enough, and I so didn't need that assignment freaking me out as well. Thankfully, I had an understanding teacher.
The main reason i don't like taking extensions is I feel really, really guilt about it. Like, oh, I could have worked harder if I'd tried, I could have done it on time, or else everyone else has problems too, they still managed it... etcetera. However, every so often, my common sense does kick in, and I just take the damn extension already. This week was one of those times.
*ok, so I don't know the EXACT story, since she's a few years below me and I heard it from someone who heard it from someone and so on, but basically she was wearing like some weird thing in her hair, and for some reason decided that it would be a really, really awesome idea to superglue it on. When she told the teacher she couldn't take it off, he pulled it, and she like lost hair and skin and whatnot. And, to be honest, all I have to say is... "SUPERGLUE? You REALLY thought that that would be a good idea? Come on..."
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Huh. I am a nerd.
So today a friend and I realised that we have just over 20 (school) days until our end of year exams. The reaction we probably should have had? "Shit! Study! Study! Study freakishly hard so we can make up for the past year of not doing anything!"
My actual reaction? "Hey, that's kind of cool."
Not because I'm looking forward to exams, as such, because I'm not. But you see, exams mean the end of the year. Exams mean, like, two and a half months off or something like that. Exams mean a holiday where there is actually no homework at all that I have to do. Exams... exams are kind of awesome in that sense.
Besides, the ones last semester... I mean, they sucked, but they weren't really that bad.
I said this to my friend, and at first he looked at me like I was crazy, but then he caught on and we started talking about what we'd do to relax during exam week (and over the holidays) and... calculating how many hours of certain subjects we still had to sit through. Because that's not nerdy at all. (besides, we were in a subject we hate and suck at, so it was really just our way of putting off work while looking like we were busy. Instead of, y'know... studying for exams/ that test we have next week.)
And even besides that, when you're on exam weeks, you don't have to actually go to school unless you're going to exams. Now, let's calculate that. I have six (well, and a bit) exams. I have 10 days off school. No matter how that works out, I'm still going to have time to do whatever the hell I want (which will, of course, be sitting at home and studying...)
Yeah... exams are going to be awesome.
Did I just say that?
My actual reaction? "Hey, that's kind of cool."
Not because I'm looking forward to exams, as such, because I'm not. But you see, exams mean the end of the year. Exams mean, like, two and a half months off or something like that. Exams mean a holiday where there is actually no homework at all that I have to do. Exams... exams are kind of awesome in that sense.
Besides, the ones last semester... I mean, they sucked, but they weren't really that bad.
I said this to my friend, and at first he looked at me like I was crazy, but then he caught on and we started talking about what we'd do to relax during exam week (and over the holidays) and... calculating how many hours of certain subjects we still had to sit through. Because that's not nerdy at all. (besides, we were in a subject we hate and suck at, so it was really just our way of putting off work while looking like we were busy. Instead of, y'know... studying for exams/ that test we have next week.)
And even besides that, when you're on exam weeks, you don't have to actually go to school unless you're going to exams. Now, let's calculate that. I have six (well, and a bit) exams. I have 10 days off school. No matter how that works out, I'm still going to have time to do whatever the hell I want (which will, of course, be sitting at home and studying...)
Yeah... exams are going to be awesome.
Did I just say that?
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